DHAKA MIXED HASH – RUN NO 1351		28^th July 2007
Location: ISD Bashundara
He’s Back, and Louder Than Ever
Hares: Syphie, Shit-Up-To-Here, Fumes, Baby Bear & Towed			Hashers: 46
Undercover Hare: Can’t Pull			Returnees: Cloth Balls, Ali Wank Bonk, Blow Pipe, Rectal Ranger & Emil
New Runners: Michael, Don			Milestones: Bum Deal – 100 runs
250 Chickens have been ****ed	The Run To be honest, the less said about the run, the better. The following brief tale is possibly indicative of the kind of problems that the Hare’s faced in setting this run. OK? So I am having this conversation with Syphie in the week building up to the run. First I suggest that we can Google Earth the run as a preliminary recce if he can provide GPS reference for his house I will have a look. Syphie replies that Google Earth ain’t that good during the monsoon and he doesn’t need GPS to find his house (he has something better called a driver). I say OK, we’ll discuss at Bozo’s housewarming that evening, please come along – House 8, Road 9 Baridhara – and we can discuss further. Two things really: Syphie actually does have a GPS, and Bozo’s address is Road 11, not Road 9. I know this because it is also my address, as I live in the apartment above. The further fact that during the setting of the run I lost track of all the other Hares after 5 minutes and spent a happy 90 minutes wending my way (on better trails!) back to Syphie’s place leads to the obvious conclusion: Syphie, please can I borrow your GPS? So, the run was questionable. Added to the above was that both Syphie and Shit-Up-To-Here were suffering major senior moments during the run and couldn’t remember where they’d left the paper in the morning. It is commendable that we actually made it to the B point. Thanks are due mainly to undercover Hare, Can’t Pull, who kept the pack heading in generally the right direction. From ISD, after ploughing through a distinctly soggy area where Ahmed had a most impressive crash between the sand pipes, we basically wandered south along the lanes, through streets and markets, tripping over the walkers, rickshaws etc., until we emerged onto the main road opposite the US Embassy. Amazing, really, that we seemed to have managed to keep everyone together. Not for much longer, though, as first Tall Man and Cloth Balls peeled off northwards up Park Road instead of turning down past the French School and then Geli and, I think, Deportee carried on off paper northwards up the lakeside. The rest of the pack took the main bridge and then up through the back streets and parks of Gulshan ‘til we finally reached Syphie’s place. Apologies for the lack of pictures of the run, but Warm & Fluffy forgot to come and I forgot to take my camera.
.. and 100 Bums Dealed
Lost Hares and Dominatrix
Classic (clean) Crasher Ahmed
The offending footwear …	The Circle Weather conditions being a tad better than last week, there was a brief respite before the circle was called to order up on Syphie’s roof. After the Hares had been dealt with (and the revelation that Can’t Pull had been travelling incognito), the acting GM welcomed new runners Michael and Don. Michael’s hashed before in Shanghai and Malaysia and Don in Texas (Yeee-hah), Indonesia and Lagos – an interesting mix. Ali Wank Bonk has returned from Sweden for a week, Blow Pipe was back from Oz and Cloth Balls has returned from UK where he had been either avoiding wife/girlfriend or finding new wife/girlfriend but as far as sex tourism was concerned he was too busy hiding behind bushes to indulge. Rectal Ranger had been in England also. Last week’s belated awards were made to Chicken F***er (250) and Can’t Pull (225) and to recently returned Bum Deal who had left in 1999 on about 97 runs and had now achieved the magical 100. Syphie was commended by the GM for having nothing better to do with his time than study the Hash Stats. Proceedings were then handed on to the gentle care of Webfart, standing in for RA Bozo who is on his hols somewhere. First complaint was against dominatrix Bum Deal, who was perpetually issuing instructions to the walkers when not even the hare. The RA postulated that Horse’s Arse must be overwhelmed when they got to bed. Next in were Hares Shit-Up-To-Here and Towed for not knowing where the trail went. Bum Deal was also dragged back in as an example of how hash instructions should be given. Crasher Ahmed, surprisingly clean after his escapades, was duly rewarded before Cloth Balls was back in for his nice shiny shoes. Not that they were too shiny by then, but they had been at the start. Webfart then hauled in England 6 – Scotland 9 and Peter for eying up the cows at Check 1. Not sure what this was about as I though the cow in the pond somewhere around Check 3 was much better looking. Dirty Girl look-alike, Ali Wank Bonk was called in for something to do with system loss of 10%. I’m afraid that both pen and brain ran out pretty much at this point and I lost track of the intellectual arguments being propounded by Webfart. Either that, or I’d nipped away from the circle to get another beer. Poser Geli was, in one swift move that totally deceived me, called in for a private party and handed back the proceedings at the same time. In the meantime I was halfway through a charge against Rectal Ranger who had been seen cleaning his shoes in a puddle outside the French School during the run. There being no further issues of interest, proceedings were brought to a close. The Gispert Memorial Run will be from Webfart’s place, 5.30 p.m. 31^st July Next Saturday’s run will be Hared by LBH, 17.30 at Nordic Club. On On Towed
… and ensuing drink
Syphie, the Hash Historian
Obscenity
Shoe washer and a couple of Returnees in the background