DHAKA MIXED HASH – GISPERT MEMORIAL RUN RUN NO 1352		31^st July 2007
Location: Webfart’s Place
Hare Brainer
Hares: LBH, Warm & Fluffy & Pubic Hare			Hashers: 19?
New Runners: none			Returnees: none
The assembled Pack	The Run It is tempting to start with the same with the same words as those I used for Run 1351: ”To be honest, the less said about the run, the better.” Half an hour before the start it had absolutely pissed down with rain and any paper that LBH might have laid was seriously gone. So it was a bit of a guided hash, with the location of the next check being divulged only at the preceding one, and get there any way you like. Run format was pretty simple really. The first check was at the old Bagha, from there it was across Rickshaw Bridge to the first gate into Baridhara, and then on and on down the lake. Not too sure what happened to Pubic Hare and the Walkers, but we just ran first down the east side of the lake to the first bridge and then on and on and on down the west side. LBH called checks pretty much as and when he felt like it. The first section down the west side involved a bit of pole dancing of a different kind where the path has settled into the lake, and then some interesting checks at frequent intervals. “Next Check is Tall Man’s house” – really helpful if you happen to know where that is. The one after that? “Gus’s house! “Gus? Gus? Who the f**k is Gus?” came the predictable response from Dirty Girl. Whoever said democracy is dead in Bangladesh hasn’t been on an LBH hash recently. We get to a point just past Gulshan 1 and LBH calls another check, by which time we’d been running for 50 minutes or so. LBH decides to hold a vote – “who want another 10 minutes run, and who wants to go for the beer?” By being unreasonably loud in her demands for the beer and threatening to call an immediate hartal, Begum Bum Deal won the day and we headed quickly through the traffic to the B point at Homebound. A nice little run for a Tuesday evening.
A Russian, not a Pole dancer
A paper-free trot in the park
The Musical tribute	The Circle Once someone had called up Pubic Hare and told him where he was supposed to be, acting GM Warm & Fluffy called the circle to order so that proceedings could commence. Most of those assembled ignored the request and carried on with their private parties so it was a little while later that things eventually got moving. When asked for opinions on the run, Towed stepped forward and insisted on singing a bastardised version of “Ou Est le Papier?” Horses Arse was called in for some reason or other but, since the power had gone off by then and the adjacent generator had started up, no-one could hear, so W&F handed over pretty smartly to stand in RA, Bum Deal, who has the vocal powers to overcome any 6-cylinder diesel. Most Obscene was immediately hauled in for some cardinal sin that was so horrific that my mind has blanked it out completely. Next was Shit-Up-To-Here and Geli. At the start of the run many were saying that Geli was definitely coming despite it being 22 minutes after the appointed time. The pack eventually decided that no-one really cared any more (or even, to be honest, had cared in the first place) whether Geli came or went. All, that is, except Shit-Up-To-Here – one of the few to carry a cell phone on the run (and think he could get away with it) – who kept calling until Geli miraculously turned up at Check 2. Cloth Balls and Can’t Pull were hauled in for some other unforgettable sin, as was Basil (it couldn’t possibly have been the two bottles of scotch that he forced that other hash to drink on the previous evening). Dirty Girl got her just deserts as well, possibly for saying f**k on the run, which we all know is a terrible thing to say, and then Syphie was asked to demonstrate the way that he danced along the logs. Not so much of a ballet dancer as a belly dancer. Bum Deal then, most unfairly, accosted the unfortunate Pubic Hare who had selflessly given up his valuable time to conduct the walkers safely to the B Point. Sadly, the useless f***er hadn’t understood where the B point was and had to be phoned up to get him there. Then we were asked to remember what we were there for, and to remind us all the two wearing Gispert Memorial T-shirts from previous years (where were this year’s??), Syphie and (possibly) Truck Yanker were stood side by side so all could read and remember. Obviously Gispert had a re-birth as, according to one shirt he was born on 30^th July and on the other, on 31^st. However, we are all grateful to him as, without his creation, none of us would be running around like lunatics and would get to the pub an hour sooner. It all got even more forgettable after that, with Deportee pulled in for something and LBH and a couple of others for something else. Eventually Bum Deal was persuaded to shut up, a final toast was drunk to Gispert, and we headed round the corner for excellent pizza and a very pleasant finish to the evening. Thanks to the Hares for taking the time to set the run and guide us safely through it and to whoever else, for arranging the pizza. Saturday’s run will be Hared by LBH, 17.30 at Nordic Club. On On Towed For those who had the courage and staying power to read to the end of this drivel (and I felt that I should fill up the remaining space somehow), the following was the musical tribute to the Hares. (Oh, L B H went to set a run, never thinking it would rain He scattered paper all around, what a very clever game But when the pack had assembled, all the paper it was gone Ou est le papier? ou est le papier? On-Hare, On-Hare, we’re going spare Ou est le papier?)
Obscene? Who, me?
Belly Dancer, Syphie
The life and times of Gispert
On-Pizza