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UPCOMING RUNS |
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Run No. |
Date |
Time/Place |
Hares |
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1354 |
11th August |
17.00 - ISD |
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1355 |
19th August |
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HARES NEEDED |
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1356 |
25th August |
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HARES NEEDED |
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1357 |
1st Sept |
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HARES NEEDED |
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DHAKA MIXED
HASH – RUN NO 1353 REPEAT GISPERT
MEMORIAL RUN |
4th August
2007 |
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Location: Nordic Club to Homebound |
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Possibly Outside
Dirty Girl’s Friend Gus’s House! |
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Hares: LBH,
Cloth Balls, Syphie, Shit-Up-To-Here, Cant Pull |
Hashers: 53 |
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Virgins: Rabi, Donald, Simon, Janine & Hans |
Leavers: Dirty Girl & Towed |
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Returnees: Tuneless Cow, 5-Year-Old-Shit, Rugger
Bugger, Foreskin, Nicole, The Pussies |
Milestones: 5-Year-Old-Shit – 25 Runs |
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The Culprits |
The Run This
time, it is compulsory to start with the same with the same words as those I
used for Run 1351 and was tempted to do so for Run 1352: ”To be honest, the less
said about the run, the better.” Not
that it was a repeat of Run 1352. For
a start it began somewhere different.
The Nordic Club is at least 100 metres away from Webfart’s place. This run had paper, or at least did after
the first kilometre or so – Tuesday’s didn’t. It went to smellier places. In
all fairness, the middle bit was different and even went down the east side
of the lake for a bit, (the smellier bit).
Interesting landmarks were pointed out – my office, Tall Man’s house,
Rugger Bugger’s house and yes – Gus’s house again, much to the delight of
Dirty Girl. We
got to the point at which LBH had taken a vote on an extra 10 minutes, but
since we’d already run a full 60 this time, it was straight to the B point at
Homebound. |
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Smelly Bits (with no disrespect to
Homeless) |
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The returning Pussies even found time for
a quick dance by the lake |
The Circle The
Hares received all the accolades they deserved, although, as Syphie pointed out,
If you can do better, then get off your arse and do it. There
was a bucket load of returnees - Tuneless Cow, back from the US and UK;
5-Year-Old-Shit – probably from another shopping trip to Jakarta; Rugger
Bugger from Southern Sudan, possibly one of the less well know sex tourist
destinations; Foreskin from Scotland and England; Nicole back from France,
and the family Pussy, presumably back from the jolly old US of A. Leavers
were Dirty Girl and me – she’s off to Doha where she’s unlikely to get her leg
over as she doesn’t bear the necessary likeness to a goat (apologies to any
Qataris who may read this, but we say similar things about Australians and
kangaroos – mind you, being ranked along with Australians isn’t exactly the
height of flattery either), and I’m off to Kathmandu to do some serious
running. Warm
and Fluffy then, finally, remembered the Virgins. Rugger Bugger reckoned it was because she forgotten about her
own, it existed so long ago. Rabi,
Donald, Simon, Janine & Hans were duly welcomed but there was so much
private partying going on I couldn’t hear a thing as to what they were doing
here or where they were from. On the
basis of this run, we’re unlikely to see them again. Miss Forgetfulness also forgot to properly
brief the virgins as to the drinking routine (I always thought that you were
supposed to de-brief virgins) so they all started slugging away as soon as
the song started. I
can’t remember who did the intro for the next down-down – probably Hash
Historian, Syphie, but it was an award to a dedicated hasher who, despite
having only done 25 runs here has been very supportive of the hash, so well
done to 5-Year-Old-Shit. W&F
then handed over to Webfart, standing in for Bozo. W&F wasn’t allowed out of the circle and given a swift down-down
for gross mismanagement of the virgins.
Keeping it in the family, as it were, Webfart then gave himself a free
beer – some garbled explanation about his latent leprosy and a failed attempt
as a career beggar. He had allegedly
been told to do this by Bozo. Next,
and not before time too, all the Hares were brought in. Complaints were made about Can’t Pull
misleading the pack (I’ve always wondered about his name – does it relate to
rickshaws, women or his pud?). Also
about Shit-Up-To-Here being a confused walking Hare. Is this a step up or down from being a
confused running Hare last week?
Syphie pointed out again, quite rightly, that we’re an ungrateful
bunch of tossers. Tuneless
Cow was then hauled in for being a wannabee German tourist. To be honest, I’m not sure that she
qualifies, as she knows how to queue.
It was something to do with her wearing sunglasses and her colostomy
bag on her back. Then
we got to the crucial bit. Gus reared
his ugly head again, if you’ll pardon the expression, and it was for Dirty
Girl. The stand in RA can be excused
for not being aware of Tuesday’s issues regarding the aforementioned Gus and
Dirty Girl. Horse’s Arse then had to
give a demo, much along the lines of Syphie’s belly dance on Tuesday, of his
granny-scaring technique. And
yes, the Supercrap Hares (RA’s words, not mine) were hauled in again. Not before time too, as they hadn’t had
any punishment for at least 5 minutes.
The next entry in my notes is decipherable, but unintelligible. It reads “Foreskin – Taleban wanabee –
f**k the paper”. It doesn’t make any
sense to me but is probably simply a verbatim transcription of Webfart’s
words. Webfart
then handed over to guest RA, FYOS, who had a serious complaint about
Myrtille and Homeless for their lack of hash gear – in Myrtille’s case her
tee shirt was non-hash, in Homeless’ case, the poor bastard didn’t have a
shirt. FYOS described it as gross and
naked. FYOS is entitled to his
opinions, I would not have called Myrtille gross myself – well built, but definitely
not gross. Or did both terms apply to
Homeless? Anyway, Homeless must have
gone home so Ahamed was called in as a Homeless look alike. The
effort of 2 down-downs and such a comprehensive charge was clearly too much
for FYOS and he duly handed control (I use the word loosely) of the circle
back to Warm & Fluffy. Next
week’s run will be at 17.00 from ISD (currently under water). I will not be there. Thanks
to the Hares for doing their bit and once again for the great Homebound
Hospitality On On Towed |
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Virgins |
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Returnees, every one of ‘em |
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Leavers |
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A very happy FYOS |
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The Crap Corner Beggar |
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No Hash Gear |
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