DHAKA MIXED HASH		RUN NO 1354
RV: Little Italy, Ashulia		11^th August 2007
Hares: Warm&Fluffy, Clothballs, TunelessCow, BabyBear			Hashers: 56
Virgins: Pritty			New Runners: BlowJob, Rick, Caroline, Schmuck
Returnees: Penís, Challenger, EagerForBeaver, GooseBumpy, Groper, CrustyLobster, DunnyGone, BozoTheClown			Leavers: Clothballs, BozoTheClown, ShitUpToHere (final)
Get-a-lifers: PickledPussy (25), Nicole (25), Peter (25)			Duration: 59mins; Distance: 6km
GM stands tall amongst Hares	The Run First country run since 7/7/7 – staying in town just because of a little rain! Warm&Fluffy’s 11^th-hour plea for hares obviously paid off as Clothballs, TunelessCow and BabyBear were all raring for haring as we rendezvous-ed outside Little Italy. Returnee GM Penís remembered that she was back on duty and eventually called the pack to order, whilst Clothballs dispensed some tips for the trail. On on along the highway and FRB’s were set to continue on on along it due to the frantic gesticulating and calling of a nearby rickshawallah, who seemed determined not to let us follow the paper which led us off and away from the road. Walkers were led on on by BabyBear at a suitable pace in the runners’ wake, and upon reaching the off-road turning (about 100 yards away) were wished farewell by newbie/visitor Schmuck as he decided to peel off and wheeze his way back to the RV. Only a little bit squelchy underfoot as runners headed off-road and into the bamboo forest where one hasher took a bit of a muddy dive, before all gathered around the first gloomy check. Check it out and a successful falsie led the majority, including hare Clothballs, away in the wrong direction. Hashers eventually found their way back to the trail amongst the bamboo and back yards and hot-footed it to the second check where Penís found a rather pointy stump to take a rest on. The trail wound on and eventually led hashers into open countryside (very nice) where, as we held the next check, a very pleased with himself BozoTheClown managed to join us, expounding the benefits of a well-set trail. Next stop the paddy fields where some paddling was followed by a balancing act was followed by a scramble up through the bushes to a check with a view (an excellent vantage for hash flash to wait in hope of a full immersion or tumble down the slope by a hasher). Once on dry land we then headed through some bamboo and straight back down into the rice paddies where as others balanced their way across the bunds, Can’tPull did it the proper way and just ran straight across the 5-inch deep water. A big loop brought us back round to familiar territory (although all of Ashulia is familiar territory), with a fair number of short-cutting bastards on the way, and as we looked out over the countryside there was a chance for a quick group flash moment before heading on in. Hashers knew their way by now, although some failed to spot the trellis wires and spliced their knees. Before too long we came up on the walkers on the final stretch – a few close-to-expiring runners promptly fell in-step and didn’t hurry on beer.
Bamboo-zled
Pole dancing GM
Easy does it Bozo
Bushed
Cat-walk?
Newbies to the DMH3	The Circle GM Penís convened the circle but as she commenced there was outcry that hashers were missing: where were WebFart and GooseBumpy? Were they lost in the wilderness? A search party led by TunelessCow and EagerForBeaver set out whilst the circle continued. Hares minus searcher TunelessCow received a well-earned DD for getting us off the streets and back to the countryside. Newbies from Zambia included BlowJob and Caroline, ready to join the ranks of the AISD regulars; Rick from Gaberone and Schmuck from all over the place squared the cirle. The usual August mass of returnees had to receive their DD in 2 batches, whilst leavers Bozo and Clothballs discovered that they were both off to celebrate their anniversary’s in England on the same day (MBA’s??). ShitUpToHere was just off. On to those certificates, including 2 hashers who’d reached 25 runs without a hash name: Nicole and Peter! BlowJob was introduced as a music teacher at this point and brought in to help us sing because we’re such a useless bunch of hashers with the musical talent of a wet fish! A some point during these proceedings WebFart and GooseBumpy arrived, no more lost than a thing that isn’t lost. RA BozoTC then proceeded to berate TunelessCow for repeatedly asking for her haring DD; ‘wingeing tuneless f**king cow’. Hares were given ‘8-out-of-10’ for setting a trail which Bozo was actually able to follow and which found him the pack. W&F, WF, CP, Penís and FartEcho (who wasn’t actually there) were then given abuse for not answering their mobiles as a late Bozo was trying to call ahead to get directions – serves him right for watching football instead of the clock! Foreskin - renamed Condom for some reason by Bozo (???) - was provided with a glowstick to hold between his be-whiskered lips whilst the rest of us sang that popular little number about the Mayor of Bayswater’s daughter (look it up if you don’t get it you useless f**ks). Various search-party heroes were also handed glowsticks along with the not-really-missing hashers, then Bozo pronounced them ‘pigs in space’. Almost forgotten virgin Pritti, visiting from Nepal, was almost overwhelmed as hashers fought to snatch the final few glowsticks from Bozo’s grasp. Myrtle from France, so deserving of a French toilet-humour song, insisted on wearing her sunglasses in the circle although it was pitch black: ‘French poseur’. RectalRanger then interjected with some comment about hashers without hash names – probably relevant but I missed it so bollox to that. Geli was asked to reinact his actions during a disappearing act CamelJockey during the run – glowsticks and a few other hashers played a part: ‘CamelJockey kebab’. HashWho for warm beer. BlowJob on how much? Peter because he looked ready to pay any price: ‘priceless blow job’. An announcement about the Acid Survivors Foundation Charity Ball on 30^th August, all proceeds to a good cause. Get ready for a special hash on 1^st September, a ‘welcome back hash’ from Tongi Bata Shoe. Next week’s hash: Little Italy 4.30pm on convoy. On on… Warm&Fluffy
Leavers and MBA’s
A trio of 25-ers
Fairy lights & shades
Glowstick or Geli’s dick?