DHAKA MIXED HASH NO 1498

SATURDAY November 14, 2009

LOCATION: AIS-D

No. of Hashers: 61

HARES: Janasty Hole, Sandy, Rocks Off, Blow Pipe

VIRGINS: Deepak, Susan

NEW RUNNERS/VISITORS: Reload

RETURNEES: Clothballs, Deportee

LEAVERS: Tuneless Cow, Deportee (he just fucking returned!!), Goosebumpy

The Dhaka mixed hash started very badly, when everyone got there on time, our RA – BLOWPIPE - doubling as the main hare, started his speech on time (in almost perfect Australian I might add), which he took nearly as long to read out (from a written list for fucks sake!!) as the run itself.

And then we actually started on time!!

What’s going on I thought as we headed off, an organized fucking hash!!

But, true to Dhaka Mixed Hash form, it soon degenerated. Can’t Pull and Smells Like Shit headed off in their normal cocky fashion – full of energy coz we’d only gone 200 mts – but it was us other fuckwits who followed them about 1 ½ km past the first turn off.

After that ensued a run through the more picturesque slums sewers of Dhaka in which the hares (above mentioned Blowpipe and his missus Rocks Off) managed to get themselves totally lost.

So when we’d passed the same bubbling brook for the third time (well, Dhaka’s version of a bubbling brook, it was actually yet another open sewer that featured strongly on this Blowpipe’s and Rocks Off’s run), Mr. Hare and Mrs. Hare excused themselves and headed to the solitude of a quant waterfall (well open sewerage falling over garbage) to work things out.

Tall Man, in his normal considerate, compassionate manner, yelled that he’s a local, they’d totally fucked up the hash, tell him where the B point is and he’d get us to the beer.

Most of us were all for this but I’m not sure how many of us brought into his next observation that this was proof positive that mixed marriages don’t work.

Anyway, about 4 hours later we roll into the B point. Yours truly, shirt off, is toweling off talking to Can’t Pull, who wasn’t listening anyway as he was too busy working out his normal devious plan to fuck off before the circle to avoid his due down downs.

Didn’t bother me coz I was, as usual after the hash run, being admired for my physique by about 12 pairs of young boys – all staring with pure admiration and all holding hands.

Well this freaked me out just a bit after, oh, 10 seconds, so I went looking for the circle only to find out the fuckers had moved it!!

Probably to avoid the normal outer circle of locals who congregate at these things.

Well, it worked because these locals didn’t form an outer circle; they formed a fucking inner circle!! Where’s Over Exposed’s entourage when you need it? Over Exposed should be made to contribute his army even when he doesn’t come - on threat of being exposed to his true identity – a Canadian illegal immigrant who overstayed his visa!

Anyway, On On now to the Arinuma weekend HASH.

Thanks Smells Like Shit for organizing this, even though I know you won’t be there. Mrs. SLS (aka Spread ‘Em) has got you busy pushing a trundler round Lavender in your Jandles looking for a new Chilly Bin, and afterwards she tells me she wants you to mow the verge out the front of the High Com.

On On to Arinuma.

Jock Itch.